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Old 06-13-2019, 08:05 AM   #1
KBScobravert
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Default renting a longhorn

Say a fella wanted rent a longhorn with a rider dressed in an Uncle Sam outfit to parade around his neighborhood. Where to find such a service locally?

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Old 06-13-2019, 08:08 AM   #2
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Id hit up one of the guys at the stockyards. Im sure if the price is right theyd do it.
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Old 06-13-2019, 08:10 AM   #3
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Yeah we need some more details on this one...
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Old 06-13-2019, 08:18 AM   #4
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A guy posted this on FB back on Easter.



Our HOA is planning a block party/parade for 4th of July.

I'd like to hire someone with a longhorn or more to parade along too.

In similar news, I land into DFW on 4th of July around 10am. I'm looking to do it big this year.

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Old 06-13-2019, 08:38 AM   #5
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You can request a Bevo appearance through the UT Austin website, not sure they'd be willing to do the uncle Sam part though. Or http://www.vidanuevaranch.com/Defaul...e=Rent-A-Steer
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Old 06-13-2019, 10:49 AM   #6
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I think this might be Soaps department.
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Old 06-13-2019, 11:41 AM   #7
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I think this might be Soaps department.
He has ridden a cow before soooooo..........
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Old 06-13-2019, 02:37 PM   #8
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Dang the owner of the land behind me just gave away 2 huge longhorns. Very gentle animals until they start swinging that head. I had to call the neighbor one evening one of them was tearing apart his new tractor! He said you have a gun shoot that fucking thing! I told him ill go see if I can throw some feed and apples over the fence to get it's attention off your tractor but I'm not shooting a cow.
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Old 06-19-2019, 03:36 AM   #9
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Found it. Took some light digging around on FB.

http://www.lonesomelonghorn.com/Texa...rn-Events.html

We are renting for an hour. I'll get to ride it in our HOA parade while the owner walks the lead. Then for whatever time is left we can let kids jump on for pictures.

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Old 06-19-2019, 06:40 AM   #10
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I like your style
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Old 06-19-2019, 06:56 AM   #11
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How do you one up a cow skin rug in the house? Ride one.

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Old 06-19-2019, 07:44 AM   #12
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New chapelle skit..."when keeping up with the Joneses goes wrong"
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Old 06-19-2019, 08:12 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by krazy kris View Post
Very gentle animals until they start swinging that head.
I got hit in the ribs by a young steer (wasn't a longhorn, though) about 20 years ago and I still have a scar. He decided he wanted out of the barn and I tried to stop him. He started swinging his head and I didn't realize I was within range of the horns. It knocked the wind out of me and hurt for a while, but surprisingly didn't break a rib.
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Old 06-19-2019, 09:16 AM   #14
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I got hit in the ribs by a young steer (wasn't a longhorn, though) about 20 years ago and I still have a scar. He decided he wanted out of the barn and I tried to stop him. He started swinging his head and I didn't realize I was within range of the horns. It knocked the wind out of me and hurt for a while, but surprisingly didn't break a rib.
Lol every time anyone would go over there (not very often) to check Wells or whatever. The damn longhorns would circle the trucks and wouldn't let them get out of their trucks. One guy checking Wells in a new Escalade dressed up all fancy did get out and walk about 100 yards to check a water well I guess he didn't get the memo. He looked up and seen them running towards him so he started running and ran right into a low lying pond about 3ft deep and fell on his face. I was laughing hysterically and said hey they just want to play! They aren't going to eat you, maybe play dead!
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Old 06-19-2019, 11:53 AM   #15
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How do you one up a cow skin rug in the house? Ride one.

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Old 06-20-2019, 01:00 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by line-em-up View Post
I got hit in the ribs by a young steer (wasn't a longhorn, though) about 20 years ago and I still have a scar. He decided he wanted out of the barn and I tried to stop him. He started swinging his head and I didn't realize I was within range of the horns. It knocked the wind out of me and hurt for a while, but surprisingly didn't break a rib.
Few years ago we hired a longhorn service company for a conference that was touring our company. People could take pics on top of a longhorn.

It was all cool until some goobernut climbing up didn't swing his leg high enough and kicked the longhorn in the ass. The longhorn forcibly lunged forward and nearly took out the camera people.

Quite exciting but always a wild card.
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Old 06-20-2019, 02:11 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by line-em-up View Post
I got hit in the ribs by a young steer (wasn't a longhorn, though) about 20 years ago and I still have a scar. He decided he wanted out of the barn and I tried to stop him. He started swinging his head and I didn't realize I was within range of the horns. It knocked the wind out of me and hurt for a while, but surprisingly didn't break a rib.
back in high school, I had a dip in, and while running steers through the squeeze shoot to get hoof trims, one jumped and kicked me right on the belt buckle. I swallowed that dip, and puked all over the place for 5 mins. I still cant stand the smell of Copenhagen long cut.
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Old 06-20-2019, 11:14 PM   #18
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Cue Thomas the Train song, choo choo muthafucka



my new alarm in the morning.

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Old 06-21-2019, 06:52 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Craizie View Post
I think this might be Soaps department.

Okay, so Soap will dress up as the LongHorn . who as Sam?
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Old 06-21-2019, 07:26 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Von Crowder View Post
back in high school, I had a dip in, and while running steers through the squeeze shoot to get hoof trims, one jumped and kicked me right on the belt buckle. I swallowed that dip, and puked all over the place for 5 mins. I still cant stand the smell of Copenhagen long cut.
Ouch. I'm sure you were glad the kick wasn't a few inches lower.

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bad idea, bull horny=ridin the nay, dumb idea, nay rent mouth 4 party, nay sez longhorn my ass, soap gets backside, wife gets horn

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