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Darwin award winner?? I think so! m What you all think??

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  • Darwin award winner?? I think so! m What you all think??

    Begin forwarded message:
    Long but good
    ANYONE want to take a shot at the odds of this ever happening again?

    For those who have served on a jury this one is something to think about. Just when you think you have heard every thing!


    Do you like to read a good murder mystery? Not even Law and Order would attempt to capture this mess. This is an unbelievable twist of fate At the 1994annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science(AAFS),President, Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death.


    Here is the story:

    On March 23, 1994,the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus, and concluded that died from a shotgun wound to the head.


    Mr. Opus , had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency. Ashe fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly.



    Neither the shooter norther deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the eighth-floor level to protect some building workers, and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.


    Theron, on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously, and he was threatening her with a shotgun! The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window, striking Mr. Opus.


    When one intends to kill subject 'A 'but kills subject 'B' in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject 'B.'


    When confronted with the murder charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant, and both said that they thought the shotgun was not loaded. The old man said it was a long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore, the killing of Mr. Opus appeared to be an accident; that is assuming the gun had been accidentally loaded.



    Long but good




    Any one want to take a shot at the odds of this ever happening again?

    For those who have served on a jury this one is something to think about. Just when you think you have heard everything!


    Do you like to read a good murder mystery? Not even Law and Order would attempt to capture this mess. This is an unbelievable twist of fate ! At the 1994annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science(AAFS),President, Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death.


    Here is the story: A medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus, and concluded that died from a shotgun wound to the head.


    Mr. Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency. Ashe fell past thirteen floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly.



    Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the third level floor to protect some building workers, and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.


    Theorem on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously, and he was threatening her with a shotgun! The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger, hecompletelymissed his wife and the pellets went through the window, striking Mr. Opus.


    When one intends to kill subject 'A 'but kills subject 'B' in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject 'B.'


    When confronted with the murder charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant, and both said that hey thought the shotgun was not loaded. The old man had a long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore, the killing of Mr. Opus appeared to be an accident that is assuming the gun had been accidentally loaded.


    The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple' son loading the shogun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of this father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother.


    Since the loader of the gun was aware of this he was guilty of the murder even though he didn't actually pull the trigger. The case now becomes one nonmurder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus.


    Now comes the exquisite twist...


    Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten-story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son, Ronald Opus, had actually murdered himself. So the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide.





    investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation
    Since the loader of the gun was aware of this, he was guilty of the murder even though he didn't actually pull the trigger. The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus.


    Now comes theexquisitetwist...


    Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten-story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. Theron, Ronald Opus, had actually murdered himself. So the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide.
    Last edited by Kart21; 04-13-2020, 11:06 AM.

  • #2
    What a strange twist.

    On another note, I had this weird sense of deja vu as I was reading it.

    On another note, I had this weird sense of deja vu as I was reading it.

    Comment


    • #3
      I’m going to go get the paper, get the paper...

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by jw33 View Post
        I’m going to go get the paper, get the paper...
        Hey Tommy, go get your fuckin shine box.
        G'Day Mate

        Comment


        • #5
          You mudafucka!!!!
          Originally posted by Silverback
          Look all you want, she can't find anyone else who treats her as bad as I do, and I keep her self esteem so low, she wouldn't think twice about going anywhere else.

          Comment


          • #6
            bound to happen eventually
            WH

            Comment


            • #7
              It's like it was written/copy-pasted by Robot Jason Garrett.
              Originally posted by stevo
              Not a good idea to go Tim 'The Toolman' Taylor on the power phallus.

              Stevo

              Comment


              • #8
                I enjoyed this story again.

                Comment


                • #9
                  The second time I read it was almost as enjoyable as the first.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Y'all know this is the opening monolog of Magnolia, right?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I liked the lead up, to the lead up, the end, to the end.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        this may be the worst post in dfwm history.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Rick Modena View Post
                          You mudafucka!!!!
                          You're a funny guy.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by talisman View Post
                            Y'all know this is the opening monolog of Magnolia, right?
                            I did not... never heard of that.



                            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronald_Opus
                            Originally posted by stevo
                            Not a good idea to go Tim 'The Toolman' Taylor on the power phallus.

                            Stevo

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by BLAKE View Post
                              You're a funny guy.
                              What did ya say, funny how?

                              You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
                              Originally posted by Silverback
                              Look all you want, she can't find anyone else who treats her as bad as I do, and I keep her self esteem so low, she wouldn't think twice about going anywhere else.

                              Comment

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