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  • Archaeology.

    Oh dear.


    Firstly, imagine every time within a day that football is mentioned by someone else. Secondly, replace it with something that you don't want to hear about every day. Say... Archaeology. Then, think carefully about how an average day would pan out.

    So, you awaken to the clock radio. It's 7AM. Just as you awaken, it's time for the news and archaeology already. Not news and other historical investigations, like library restorations or museum openings (unless there's another event happening), but just the news and archaelogy. Malaysian plane is still missing. Pistorius is still on trial. New dig announced in Giza. Ancient Mayan temple discovered. Exciting stuff.

    Time for a bite to eat over the morning TV. More news. More archaeology. Yes, you are aware of what is up with the missing plane. Fine. Now the archaeology in video format. Video of people dusting off some skulls and bits of pottery. All well and good, but archaeology isn't your thing. It would be nice to hear about something else.

    Even when it isn't archaeology season, the media follow noted archaeologists. They drive fast cars, date beautiful women, advertise fragrances, and sometimes they go to nightclubs and act in the worst possible way. Scandals erupt as the tabloids follow these new celebrities when they're not searching the past for answers. It is entirely possible you can recite the names of certain researchers, even if you don't pay attention to archaeology. You don't know what transfer season is, but you know that someone was transferred to a dig in Peru for a sum of money that could fund the London Underground for two whole days.

    Out of the car at 8:55 and into work. What are the colleagues talking about, I wonder? Oh, Jones dropped a 3,890 year old pot and smashed it? What a useless wanker! Someone should do something unpleasant to him. And don't even ask about the unfortunate incident in Athens two years ago - you'll be there all day! Breaking a pillar like that! We don't talk about that here, mate. What? You don't want to discuss the finer points of the prevalence of phallic imagery in Pompeii? Is there something wrong with you?

    The drive home from work. Every thirty minutes, no matter the station, someone mentions the archaeology. Best sit in silence. Drive past a huge billboard with a black and white picture of a rakishly handsome archaeologist draped over an impossibly beautiful woman. He's winking at you. Trowel in his left hand, supermodel in the right. Jurassic, by Calvin Klein.

    And now the pub. A nice pub with a beer garden. Posters in the windows. LIVE EXCAVATION AT THE VALLEY OF THE KINGS! All of it on a huge TV with the volume up too loud. Drunken people yelling at the screen. "SEND IT FOR CARBON DATING, YOU USELESS ***K!" "WHAT ARE YOU ON, MATE? DUST THE ANCIENT MEDALLION GENTLY! SMELTING METHODS OF THE TIME PRODUCED VERY SOFT AND IMPURE METALS EASILY PRONE TO DISFIGURATION!" All this from two men out of a crowd of twenty. One lousy drunken idiot and his chum ruin the image of other archaeology fans. Carbon dating report from the lab updates on TV, read by a man employed because they've been following the beautiful science since they were a boy. The drunk chimes in again. "WHAT PHARAOH'S REIGN DID YOU SAY? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS SAYS ABOUT THE UNDERPINNINGS OF OUR THEORY OF AGRICULTURAL DEVELOPMENT OF 4TH BC EGYPT? GET IN, MATE!" A cheer cascades through the building and you can only wonder why.

    Best go home and avoid anyone who might be drinking and singing. You once met a disagreeable chap who threatened to beat you up because you didn't watch the archaeology. "Not a late paleolithic era supporter are you? Think you're better than me? I'll have you, you scrawny tw*t!"

    To bed. To repeat the cycle tomorrow. The inescapable, inevitability that wherever you go, someone, somewhere, is just dying to talk to you about the archaeology.


  • #2
    I would say quit being a pussy, maybe quit listening to that station, dont go to sports bars and get new freinds if its that big of a problem.
    ازدهار رأسه برعشيت

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    • #3
      Lol I bet this is how DOHCTR feels
      Originally posted by Nash B.
      Damn, man. Sorry to hear that. If it'll cheer you up, Geor swallows. And even if it doesn't cheer you up, it cheers him up.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Wicked98Snake View Post
        Lol I bet this is how DOHCTR feels
        He isn't the only one. I couldn't give two shits about football, baseball, hockey, or basketball. I tune it out with a quickness.

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        • #5
          I don't see the problem. If the majority of folks liked archaeology, then I certainly wouldn't whine about it just because I didn't like it. The world, and certainly the media, doesn't revolve around me and my preferences.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by jluv View Post
            I don't see the problem. If the majority of folks liked archaeology, then I certainly wouldn't whine about it just because I didn't like it. The world, and certainly the media, doesn't revolve around me and my preferences.
            I feel like this is more targeted at the fans that talk endlessly about sports regardless of how the recipient feels about it. Like I said, sports aren't my thing but rather often I get trapped in a conversation about sports more often than I care to. My current neighbor does it to me all the time. I have flat out told him I don't give a crap about it but he is relentless. Nice guy and a awesome neighbor, but a bit thick sometimes.

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            • #7
              I'm the same way PB, couldn't care less about sports.

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              • #8
                Repost from Reddit, but yeah describes it pretty accurate to a non sports fan.

                I actually got a little excited when I saw the thread title because I may have a chance in a few months to volunteer on a Mammoth dig in Ellis or Navarro county and it had me curious.

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                • #9
                  I'm the same. More times than I can count someone will start talking to me about sports and I usually respond with IDK don't watch/care. If I'm lucky it will get me out of most convos some people are a bit thick for sure.
                  1997 Miata - Weekend\Autox Car
                  1994 Mustang Cobra - Garage Shelf
                  2012 Mazda 3 - Daily

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                  • #10
                    I too clicked this because I thought it was actually going to be about archaeology.

                    I don't listen to sports talk, I don't watch the news on TV, and when people try and talk to me about football, baseball, or basketball I simply tell then I have no idea what you are talking about, nor do I care. If that doesn't work I start talking about model airplanes until they walk away. Beat them at their own game I say!

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                    • #11
                      Everything is a repost from Reddit.

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                      • #12
                        I used to enjoy sports until I realized how much time is wasted on them. My buddy likes to brag about how great his fantasy football team is doing and I'll tell him how great my investments are doing.
                        De Oppresso Liber.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Frank View Post
                          I actually got a little excited when I saw the thread title because I may have a chance in a few months to volunteer on a Mammoth dig in Ellis or Navarro county and it had me curious.
                          That sounds like fun. I have an aunt that used to be an amateur archaeologist before she was put on oxygen, I always thought it was the coolest thing to see a T rex skull in her basement when I was a kid.
                          Last edited by Pokulski-Blatz; 05-13-2014, 07:25 AM.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by 95ragtop View Post
                            I used to enjoy sports until I realized how much time is wasted on them. My buddy likes to brag about how great his fantasy football team is doing and I'll tell him how great my investments are doing.

                            lol!

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                            • #15
                              I do actually like sports, it's about all I'll watch on TV, and I pretty much only listen to The Ticket. However I can relate as I don't watch or give 2 shits about any of the TV shows that are being cancelled or renewed, and when people start talking about Gray's Anatomy or something I tell them I don't care about the show unless she will show more of her anatomy.

                              I also understand that to people who don't like sports it can be a beating... sorry about that. Not sorry enough to hope that it changes, but it seemed like a nice thing to say.
                              Originally posted by stevo
                              Not a good idea to go Tim 'The Toolman' Taylor on the power phallus.

                              Stevo

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