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just when you think you enough things to worry about...

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  • just when you think you enough things to worry about...

    ... you now have to worry about getting attacked by herpes-infected monkeys.

    If any state in the union best represents the dangers of invasive species, it's Florida. The Sunshine State is home to what's been a raging Burmese python invasion for some decades. And its Cuban tree frog problem isn't doing the eco-system any favors either.

    But now the state has a new issue: wild monkeys—with herpes.

    There are about 1,000 feral Rhesus monkeys living in Florida right now. The majority of those scooped up by wildlife officials over the years have tested positive for the Herpes B virus, and this week, the entire colony was declared a public health hazard.

    A small handful of the wild animals originally landed in the state in the 1930s, courtesy of "Colonel" Tooey, a tour operator who wanted to give visitors a Tarzan-inspired experience of Florida's Silver River State Park.

    Tooey kept the monkeys sequestered on an island, but they've since taught themselves how to swim, easily reaching the mainland and putting down roots as far as Jacksonville, which is hundreds of miles away.

    Herpes B doesn't cause serious symptoms in these particular animals, but in humans, it can lead to neurological impairment or fatal encephalomyelitis, an inflammation of the brain and spinal cord.

    Florida's Rhesus monkeys are known to act aggressively towards people, and the state's Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, concerned the animals could spread their disease or cause other injuries, are warning tourists and natives to be aware and keep their distance.
    Stevo
    Originally posted by SSMAN
    ...Welcome to the land of "Fuck it". No body cares, and if they do, no body cares.

  • #2
    Nothing to worry about unless you're a dirty ass monkey-fucking Cuban.

    Comment


    • #3
      Only 1000 and they can't solve the problem?
      "It's another burrito, it's a cold Lone Star in my hand!"

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      • #4
        Somebody better tell the white girls...

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        • #5
          10 Texas red necks and an unlimited hunting pass.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Buick355 View Post
            Nothing to worry about unless you're a dirty ass monkey-fucking Cuban.
            Using a condom would help with that, but personally I'd be afraid of getting bit.

            Stevo
            Originally posted by SSMAN
            ...Welcome to the land of "Fuck it". No body cares, and if they do, no body cares.

            Comment


            • #7
              There was one loose in St Pete for a few years. Never did venture into my backyard.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by ALLAN View Post
                There was one loose in St Pete for a few years. Never did venture into my backyard.
                Or you would have fucked the shit out of it! ammirite?

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Sean88gt View Post
                  Somebody better tell the white girls...
                  Did nobody get this? For shame, people!

                  I liked it, Evil Sean.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by racrguy View Post
                    Did nobody get this? For shame, people!

                    I liked it, Evil Sean.
                    I excel at understated racially insensitive/accurate quips.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Sean88gt View Post
                      I excel at understated racially insensitive/accurate quips.
                      I know, I just expected this crowd to pick up on it quicker.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        lmao!! Monkey island has been compromised! They know how to swim now!

                        Holy shit that's funny. We used to tell an old coworker we were going to throw her on monkey island with the aids monkeys..
                        WRX

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                        • #13
                          Sounds like a job for George Zimmerman.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by thesource View Post
                            Sounds like a job for George Zimmerman.
                            And with that, I spilled my drink at my desk lmao!

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                            • #15
                              Great! Next thing will be that they can fly too.

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