Originally posted by idrivea4banger
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Mild Cheddar cheese man!Originally posted by Yale View PostLeave a comment:
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Open letter to the coolest newly divorced guy in my neighborhood:
As I was making my way through the scant Stephenville traffic earlier today on my way to work, I began to pass you on highway 8, and thought, "nice beach cruiser, dude." It wasn't until I actually passed you that I heard what I thought to be a weed eater. That was enough to get a, "WTF?" face out of me, and as I swung my head around, you had a mighty smirk, and an all too knowing nod for me, as I realized that was the gas-powered beach cruiser from your 11th birthday that your mom dug out of the garage after your wife got the Cavalier and the single-wide in the divorce. That look, coupled with your mullet, molestache, cut-off jorts and flip flops, painted a picture that made me chuckle for all 8 hours of my shift. I knew in that brief moment your mom gave you $5 for some 2-ply and a quart of milk from the Dollar General. I also knew you had no intention of letting any of that money make it there, no way. Your afternoon held the promise of all the gaming $5 could get you at the truckstop the next town over, whose slot machines might only be redeemable in store credit, but whose bountiful tokens you so fervently hope will ensure you return with not only the 2-ply and the quart of milk you promised your mom, but also a 6-pack of Natty Light talls, and a pack of Dorals to get you through your closing shift at Taco Casa. Dude, your secret's safe with me. I won't tell mom. Just remember this excuse if you lose that $5: "The ex-wife took it."
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